Driving Away

Ohmygosh, you guys.  The ordeal I just went through.  

I had a lovely dinner with my very good friends, food made by a spectacular and wonderfully accommodating chef, on a warm summer night in DTLA.  That's Downtown Los Angeles, to all of y'all country folk.  When I got back to my car in the underground parking lot, I opened the driver's door and in flew a HUGE BUG.  I quietly screamed behind my mask.  

The bug was flying around inside my car and was probably confused and didn't know how to get out.  It might have been a big moth, but I don't think they have those in DTLA.  Big cockroaches, yes.  With wings, though.  Now mind you, I’m not that squeamish about roaches, but I've only seen the ones with wings when I've been in the Philippines.  Or Texas.  I don't like the ones that fly because yikes!  Whatever it was, I wanted it out of my car.  I opened all of the doors to my car, hoping that I could guide it out of there. But I couldn't find it.  

I don’t know if it flew out when I was trying to open the doors but I didn't want to risk it surprising me again, so I closed the doors, turned on the car, and opened all of the windows and the sun roof.  I couldn't wait around to see it because I needed to get home and go to the bathroom, so off I went.

Mind you, this parking area had many, many levels, and as I wound around and around to get to the ground floor, I listened for that bug.  Nothing. When I finally exited the structure, I was aware that I was in DTLA and maybe shouldn't have all of my windows rolled down, but there weren't that many people walking around, so I risked it.  

As I drove on the freeway, air was whipping through the car, and my very long hair was whipping around, too, some getting in front of my face because I didn't stop to tie it back.   I kept trying to get it out of my face without driving recklessly and without letting my mask fall off, because you know what would happen?  That bug would probably surprise me again and I didn't want it to fly into my mouth mid-scream.  You know, because then I really would have caused an accident and I still needed to pee.

 I thought I could hear the bug flapping its wings and trying to fight against the wind.  Going 80 mph, I thought that it had to be taken by the air somehow, right?  No, I'm not crazy enough to think that I was outrunning the bug.  I just thought that the violence of the wind would throw it out of there.  I also don't know if what I heard was the bug or a couple of turtle-killing straws that some fast food person had forced into my hand against my will.  But I heard something back there, and it wasn't the drum corps music on my car stereo.  

When I finally got home, I opened all of the car doors again, but couldn't see the bug.  I forgot to look for the straws.  I just hoped that it didn't get tangled in my hair.  I looked in the mirror, and I looked like Witch Hazel from Looney Tunes.  Like, if I could dash away quickly, bobby pins would drop.  Bobby pins that clearly I wasn't wearing before.  But now I'm dreading that the bug is going to still be in my car when I leave in the morning.  Wish me luck!