Like in all families in my culture, anyone that is the age of my parents is an Auntie or Uncle, depending on their gender, of course, and it didn't matter if you remembered them or not. But with Auntie Nancy, it was different for me and Bro. Auntie Nancy and Uncle Romy were my parents' friends since the time that they moved here from the Philippines, back in the early 1970s. When I met them, I was 6 years old, and their daughter, Michelle, was 2. So I had nothing in common with her. Whatever, they were friends with my parents, and we had gatherings every month or so, thanks to Jenn's parents, who had introduced our families to each other.
Time went by, and eventually, Michelle's family and my family grew closer as we would take camping trips with other families. Our 2 families had the same interest of venturing out farther than the California border, and Michelle's family eventually bought a motor home in which to travel in style. I remember the excitement we shared when Uncle Romy showed it to our family, and made plans to eventually get a boat. That boat thing never actually happened, but we were happy nonetheless. Before the motor home, we shared a huge tent, and sometimes Mich and I would just share a pup tent so we could giggle all night. With the motor home, we had to giggle a little bit quieter, but were always the last to go to sleep after watching the campfire and giggling outside.
We didn't just hang out in the summer: we saw each other on many weekends just to spend time together, and we also shared the big holidays together. Since we were spending so much time with Michelle's family, it was inevitable that Michelle and I would grow closer. We were both boy crazy and talked about our crushes and boyfriends and shared our heartaches with each other. We became best friends, and I have Auntie Nancy and my mom to thank for forcing us to spend time together. Oh, yes, of course, and our dads, who just loved driving to all of the different national parks and entertaining us with their corny jokes. Our families were bonded for life.
Then things happened and a divorce got in the way, but Michelle and I remained close, as did Auntie Nancy, Janice (Mich's sis), and my family. Bro stayed with them for part of the time that he was doing an apprenticeship in Temecula. I stayed over several times, and remember being there on the morning of the Northridge earthquake, shaking away and trying to find door jambs. Auntie Nancy always opened her house for everyone to stay, no matter how crowded the bedrooms became.
Yes, our families had quite the history together. When my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer, she wanted it kept quiet, but I was too distraught and confided in Michelle. Their family supported us all the way until her remission. Then Auntie Nancy was diagnosed, and her disease was far more advanced than my mom's had been when it was discovered. The prognosis wasn't good, but Auntie Nancy fought with all of her might up until the very end. When I thought about her the night that she passed, I wept when I thought of how unfair it was that my best friend does not get to have her mom around anymore, due to the same disease that my own mom survived. I am truly blessed that my mom's cancer was caught at a very early stage and could be treated. I pray that she stays cancer-free. But Michelle doesn't get to go to her mom for advice about her kids, and she doesn't get to hear her mom call her for dinner anymore. My heart breaks for her.
Auntie Nancy had a wonderful soul. Living up to her name, which, in Hebrew, means "full of grace", she was always gentle and smiling, even when she was scolding us kids for doing whatever foolish thing we did. When I would talk with her, I always felt like she was on my side, even though maybe she was actually sympathizing with my mom instead. It was just that sweet smile of hers (but don't worry, Mich, I never told her our secrets). She left behind two beautiful daughters, and 2 grandchildren. She lived a full life, full of friends and happiness and wonderful memories.
I told Michelle last night that one of my favorite memories of her mom is this: whenever we went on one of our trips, there would come a point when it was time to eat a snack. Auntie Nancy would take out the Tupperware, open it, and offer us her delicious mamon cupcakes. They were tasty and just sweet enough (no icing or anything: just cake) to satisfy a sweet craving. Whenever I see mamon, I think of Auntie Nancy and our camping trips.
The picture below was taken in 1986, at Zion National Park. Auntie Nancy is in the pink tank top, and for some reason, I joined in their family picture. I guess printed bermuda shorts were the style those days! That was a memorable trip for us, as Mich and I had to deal with being homesick because we missed our boyfriends. Thank goodness our parents knew better than us and took us to see Zion, Bryce Canyon, Yellowstone, Salt Lake City, Devil's Tower, Mount Rushmore, and the Grand Canyon with the Yabut family. That was a fantastic trip. It is due to this trip that Bryce Canyon is one of my favorite places in the world, mainly because of the wonderful memories of that summer.
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| Sher and the Vidals -- July 20, 1986 |
Thank you, Auntie Nancy, for your gentle spirit. Thank you for all of the memories of camping and karaoke and all of the laughter we shared. But most of all, thank you for giving birth to my very best friend. I'll miss you dearly.
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